Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

Here's a joke for you, my life...

How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

i need teepee for my bunghole! jlr

what is worse than joel an infested asshole

A black man and two Mexican men are all in the same car, who's driving? One of the Mexicans.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

Did you just fall from heaven? If not I'm gonna beat the shit out of you

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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