Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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What is yellow, and cannot swim? A School Bus.

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... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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One day, a Hippo was riding a scooter and an ant was sitting on the back seat. Suddenly they meet with an accident. They both fall from the scooter on their heads but only the hippo gets hurt. How??? Because the ant was wearing a helmet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops