What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Tilt your screen back .

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red, They are also violet, yellow, white, pink, orange, purple, or orange.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops