Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

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What is yellow, and cannot swim? A School Bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

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What's black and white and red all over? A plague victim.

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Nickelback

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops