If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

A fat man walked into a hot dog.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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