Your mother is so obese, that when shot with a high velocity round from a handgun, the bullet is unlikely to penetrate the several layers of fat protecting her vital organs, like a fleshy kevlar vest. However, she is likely to die from infection, which is highly commom among gunshot wounds.

A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

roses are red turtles are random. cancer

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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