Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

What did the black college graduate say to the Jewish high school dropout? Do you want me to also clean your fourth floor executive bathroom, Mr. Bernstein?

it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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