Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Did you hear about the man who went up into space without a space suit? He died.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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How do you kill a fish? You bite off its head.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

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I am quite mature.

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

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Hey, dude, wanna hear a joke? Sure... Pussy. ...I dont get it... Exactly! HAHAHAHAHAHA

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

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Racial Equality

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What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

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Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

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Penis.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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