A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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