how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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Penis.

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What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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How do you kill a fish? You bite off its head.

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Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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Hey, dude, wanna hear a joke? Sure... Pussy. ...I dont get it... Exactly! HAHAHAHAHAHA

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Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

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Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

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I am quite mature.

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Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

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Racial Equality

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rawrrrrrrrrrrr

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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