Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

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I like my women like I like my coffee.......... I don't like coffee

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops