"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the rabbi say to the bartender? Hi, Mark!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops