A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

whats black and strange a paki

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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