How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

run farther?

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

what did the black mother think of her daghter's white boyfreind? i dont know i cant read minds

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

kathryn atkins

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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