Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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What is the deferince between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Q: What do you get when you cross an alcoholic and a sex addict? A: A baby

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

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what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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Why was the white man's baby black? The mother was black.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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why do asprins work? Because they're white

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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Timothy started school at an elementary and was in the fourth grade. His teacher was Ms Bradshaw, and he liked his class. One day as he was going into class, Ms Bradshaw asked everybody, "what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?" Timothy raised his hand and said "the holocaust." The teacher went to her desk and pulled out a desert eagle and shot Timothy five times in the face and raped his dead body

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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