What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life" life sentence: a prison term lasting as long as the prisoner lives; "he got life for killing the guard"

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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i have alzheimer's, so i forgot the punchline to this joke

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What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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A Palestinian woman walks into a library. She is promptly stoned to death.

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Q: Why was the gorrilla arrested? A: He broke a law.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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