Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the black guy say to the other black guy? We are both black

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Skrillex.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

thumb_up thumb_down -11

LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops