Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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What is the deferince between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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How many people does it take to light a fag? I love BBW porn!!!!

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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69

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Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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