A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -17

ANDERS!! Thanks for the warnins, I mean I wuld beat you up even when I can barely move, but I just told the doc and the nurse to shut this door, thanks man, would never thought about that if you had not warned me... beat me up when I am poisoned? Your mom replied, it sasy "I do not like the idea" You know what I told you about not right? DO NOT THINK ABOUT A blue elephanT! WOSH BLUE ELEPGANT IN YOur MIND, ITS LIKE SAYING I AM NOT INTEREsted in KNOWING MUCH MORE! Your sister? YOu know she has a crush on me, ill fuck her so hard youul will know when she wont be able to walk straight or sit YES Id meet you, but you know... Ladies first... PS: OF Co0uRse iTS mY dick, in her mouth, it looks wrong because I AM FULL ON VALIUM YOu POISONOUS VENOM I wont turoture you, I mean not physically, but consider this the first picture, and if you want to see your mom and sister nekkid, then keep receiving picks. My skin is tan, yet they call me Black, the cloror of my soul. read below people, I am gonna bang his sistar, and his mom, watch out for the nekkid pics before they get removed on... Rate my ex, yeaaaah... any moment now, dont adress me anymore Anders, becuz the door is closed, and I cant saty awak anymore, nobody is coming in the doc said, its the bald guy with the smile, I told him to give you my phone with the last pic, he said maybe and asked if you wound nt get mad... Screw that phone, its full of your girlfriends nekkid pics anyways XD, he caught me sticking the finger btw, not the rest... And fuck you. Nero, the fucker.... Soon...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other muffin says nothing because it is a muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what's worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath? the live one has to eat it's way out. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out? more dead babies dumped on the already existing pile. what's worse than the giant pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out, but there are more dead babies piled on top? this is all in your basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

YOU: Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy swimming in a pool? Nothing except one has melenan in their skin

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -17

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Kyle grund parker coffey

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops