I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

whats the difference between a dead body and a car with doors that open in a diagnal manner one was never alive to begin with

A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

Whats more worse than a dead baby? You shouldn't be thinking about dead babies or stuff worse than them, it is sad.

what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

If Billy has 4 apples in his left hand and 6 apples in his right hand, what does he have? Very large hands.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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