what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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A pigeon walks into a bar. Someone left the door opened.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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