Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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8===D

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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