What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What comes after 69... Mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down -12

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Woman are equal and deserve respect just kidding they should suck my ****

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Guess what? Random shit. Why? Because almost nobody looks at the newest jokes to realize that 99.999% of jokes that just say random shit never get above the 0 mark.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops