Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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