Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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