why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

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I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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knock knock? whos there? danielle danielle who? danielle the liar...hehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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