Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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what do you say to a black guy on steroids? B!tch please

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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