Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

Aww, I knew you where a sweetheart at the core Nerochan, I mean I look up towards people that don't give a jack about what others think but I am not as good at it as you are. Now can you please spam that away like really quickly now?

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

you just read an anti-joke

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

Feminism

"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

The Big Band Theory

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Hey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...