whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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Paddy Englishmen, Paddy Irishmen and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. They realise that they all share a common name and make a casual joke about it.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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"Knock Knock" "Come in"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

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What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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