what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

White NBA players.

Whats the difference between a pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

roses are red violets are blue grass is green

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

Barack Obama

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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