Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas?? -nothing, he didn't make it that far

What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

Why did the fridge break? Because someone threw a fridge at it.

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

hey i just met you.. and this is crazy. but here my facebook so add me maybe!!

A Serbian Film

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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