Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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