Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

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Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

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i found waldo.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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Q. Whats the diffrence between a squirl and a chipmunk? A. A squirl has a squirl mom and a squirl dad while a chipmunk has a chipmunk mom and a chipmunk dad.

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Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

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There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

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Justin Bieber hits puberty

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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NEVER

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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