What did the man say when he was stabbed on the street? Nothing, because he died.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no hands.

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One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

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Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

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Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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What is your bill about? Clinton

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Why is the black guy afraid of the white guy? He's not, it's the other way around.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Buttercups are yellow Thats about it

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How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops