If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

A man walks into a bar, little did he know it was a gay bar and a few of the regulars were drinking and got overly aggressive the unaware man was then forced into the bathroom and raped by the aggressive gay lovers

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

Q- what do you call a Jew swimming in the Antarctic? A- Dead, any man wouldn't survive swimming in water that cold

the NAACP

A lady with alzheimers walks up to her friend and says" my nefew died today" and her friend replied.. " no he died three years ago."

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

Micheal jackson had half a pie, Fred had the other half of the pie, They both shared a pie.

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

Can midgets still have big dreams?

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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