why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

mexicans fishing

Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

What's the difference between a 1980 mustang and a pile of dead babies? I don't have the mustang in my garage.

What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...