A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

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mat (telling anti joke): so you are stranded in a desert, right and kyle: no. Mat: no man i'm Kyle: no (kyle was later found dead)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

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What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

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Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

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In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

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what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

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Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

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Why did the student go to university? To pursue a higher education.

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

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Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

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How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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