Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

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Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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can you touch your toes? no

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

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Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops