True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

A horse walks into a bar, and is then put down because of the injuries it sustained from the impact.

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

What is a jew in space? Dead

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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