What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

How many TV shows are there? A lot.

What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

a man walked into a bar and said ow

What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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