Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

what is this joke about? - i don't know i am still writing the j

A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

This is a joke.

why was the cat black it was a black cat

Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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