This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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