What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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I shot a bitch.

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

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--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

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Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

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Whos allergic to BS You R! :D

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Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops