When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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Conversation: Hey dawg? Whats that? Hey, remember curiosity killed the cat! You threatening me on my life and calling me a pussy? Im calling the cops. ...Because like Larsons some of my ideas suck, but since I am an asshole I also add them to fill some space.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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I like U.............................nicorns :D

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Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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