Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

Chick Norris... Enough said

why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

Connor is homosexuaI

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

I don't mind gays unless they shove it down people's throats.

A Duck walks into a bar.

What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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