How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

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If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

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What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

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don't just stand there

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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What do you call a Ku Klux Klan member who has been set on fire? Burnt Marshmallow.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

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A horse walks into a bar, and is then put down because of the injuries it sustained from the impact.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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my wife out of the kitchen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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