How old is victor? Half past dead

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

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AIDS.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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roses are refds violet are xaflj;k it sucks having turretts syndroewe

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

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Wenis Penis

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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