Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Sharvil has aids 4 times

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -16

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops