Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

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What did the African say to the Mexican? "Hola, Como estas?" and the Mexican did not respond because he didn't speak Spanish.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

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Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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the economy.

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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the NAACP

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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yo mama is so fat that when she stepped on the scale she exclaimed "wow, i'm overweight" she then proceeded to eat a cupcake to mask her pain.

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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