What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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p lkl

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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An American man walks to Mc Donalds.

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http://citizenmcgeedotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/borat-banana-hammock.jpg?w=300

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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